In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
She even gives head with a lisp.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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