This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
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