Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
