I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
