their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize