Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
