It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
