i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
