u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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