The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
