Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Are my feet made of real feet?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
