who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
