I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
