Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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