I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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