Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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