I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
