I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
