You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
It's never too late to be topless.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
