I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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