Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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