we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize
