He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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