I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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