At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
