You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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