you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize
