And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
