He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize