it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
