He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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