you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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