I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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