im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize
