do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize