I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
