Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
