Your mouth is God's brothel.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
