My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
