I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
