Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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