i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
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