The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
