I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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