so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
My bed smells like the plague
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
