I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
