this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
