yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
