she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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