What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
